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Latest jokes update with Dindy 7

Posted: 13 Mar 2017, 16:02
by Dindy
1). shout out to those girls who's face are as bright as the sun but body as dark as my mum's cooking pot...don't worry you will end up attracting a female lizard....#Agama babes.

2). Shout out to those people shouting softwork!.. You think money comes easy...i am sorry for your poor future.

3). Shout out to those who turns to see the face of people who drives wrongly... Like seriously will you pull out the person and beat the person?...mtcheew lukuluku.

4). Shout out to those men carrying girls up and down like it's their achievement in life...keep it up one day your oga go fade away.

5). Shout out to my guys smoking to the peak....please don't stop keep it up after all no be my lungs go get hole.

6). Shout out to my street girls forming day chicken go enter stew.

7). Shout out to my niggas drinking ten bottles and more...well it is good to know that your kind are around so that when drought comes we would just cut open your tank and drink of your storage.....#foolish life.

8). Shout out to my girls wearing short skirt...please don't who rape girls love it.

9). Shout out to those pregnant women who sit like they just finished eating the universe......don't worry the lord is your strength.

10). Shout out to my men with big day we shall see the fruit of your glorious labour.

:D :D :D


Re: Latest jokes update with Dindy 7

Posted: 25 Mar 2017, 23:53
by Dindy
I was all alone at home so i decided to go visit a friend of mine.

When i got to his house, i knocked softly on his door. To my surprise he didn't respond, so I went inside.

When I got in, I found no one. So I went to his room.

On getting to his room I heard the shower running. I thinking it was him went in to see him.
I got to the bathroom and found a lady with a towel tied around her chest.

I instantly got excited. The lady looked at me and said "Hy handsome, do you wanna take your bath with me?".

I replied instantly saying "Yes yes yes". She immediately starting kissing me on my neck then mouth. She slowly unbuttoned my shirt while still kissing me with passion.

After She fully unbuttoned my shirt and unhooked my trouser she suddenly stop and said to me "Are you ready for the real fun?".

Me, already lost in the action thought of nothing and said quickly pulling down my trouser "Yes yes, your baby Dindy is ready".

She slowly placed her hands on the towel she wore and was about to remove it when I heard "CUT!, THIS SCENE IS OVER".

I swear to God, I almost killed the director that very day.

:lol: :lol:


Re: Latest jokes update with Dindy 7

Posted: 25 Mar 2017, 23:55
by Dindy
That moment when you lie to everyone that you are in 300 level and one of your friend asks you how is your GP, but you have no idea what it means.

Friend: So Dindy how high is your GP?.

Dindy: Goal possession?.

Friend: Ehn?.

:lol: :lol:

Re: Latest jokes update with Dindy 7

Posted: 25 Mar 2017, 23:58
by Dindy
Someone sent a wonderful message to me.
Let me share it with you guys.
How to be a policeman; be a regular thief.

How to become a native doctor; be a fan of Nigerian movies.

How to become a lawyer; lie to your wife and never get caught.

How to bleach; look at an agama lizard.

How to be a wrestler; watch the house of assembly daily.
Oya I dey my toilet come beat me.

:tongue: :tongue: :tongue:


Re: Latest jokes update with Dindy 7

Posted: 26 Mar 2017, 00:00
by Dindy
The nightmare of every Nigerian child.

School, writing, no Christmas clothe and rice, increase in the price of indomie.

The nightmare of every Nigerian adult.

Bride price, phone call from in law, No light to watch zee world.

:D :D


Re: Latest jokes update with Dindy 7

Posted: 26 Mar 2017, 00:03
by Dindy
Two popular madmen Dindy and David who lived not too far from the express road were seriously arguing on who was more insane.

David: See I craze pass you.

Dindy: Shut up, no be last week your madness start.

David: Ok i go prove am.

David stood up and ran straight and hit his head heavily on a hard-rock wall.

Dindy: So for your mind now you craze like that abi?.

David: Shut up you fit do am?.

Dindy: I go do pass that one. I fit drink shit.

David: Go sit down, you no fit.

Dindy went to a close by pit and started eating shit.

David: For your mind now you craze pass me abi? I go show you say I craze pass you.

David went to the express road and jumped in front of a fast moving truck. The truck knocked him down and killed him instantly.

Dindy went straight to his corpse and said "So for your mind now, you think say you craze pass me and you fit run as you die.... I dey go drown myself now, the match never end".

:lol: :lol:

Re: Latest jokes update with Dindy 7

Posted: 26 Mar 2017, 00:04
by Dindy
I told my mum that I did abortion today and she started shouting, calling everyone at home including my dad. My dad came and started shouting including my annoying aunty.

I am just so angry right now, can't someone abort sleep and stay happy or is sleep abortion a crime?.

:lol: :lol: